If only there was a step-by-step guide on how to meet your husband’s needs…
It’s not like you don’t get your guy. You get him… kind of. Just not enough to pinpoint what it is that he wants exactly. And as his wife, you feel like you’ve failed.
At the beginning, it would’ve been no big deal. Like when you two were first dating, that mystery of not really understanding each other yet was fun. It was an exciting process of peeling away all the layers and getting to know one another.
Now that you’re in a long-term committed relationship, you’re tired of the guessing game. You just want things to work and for him to be happy. And a piece of that puzzle is figuring out ways to meet your husband’s needs.
Good thing you’ve found us because clarity is right around the corner. Will we be providing you with a manual? No, we’ll be giving you something much better. A clear blueprint to understand your guy and a plan so that his needs are met in your relationship.
Let’s be honest, a marriage can only last so long when someone doesn’t feel satisfied, fulfilled and happy. So let’s not wait any further and get straight to the tips and processes that can turn your relationship around. The key is to take it on with an open mind and actively apply what you’ve learned here to your marriage.
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I Don’t Know How to Meet my Husband’s Needs!
I didn’t get it. Where did I go wrong? I was doing the best that I could every single day, working myself to the ground for our relationship. What more did Jachym want?
Each weekday evening was spent making sure that a hot meal was on the table when he got home from work. I kept our social calendar full with barbecues with friends, hikes with like-minded people and brunches with his family. I even signed us up for ballroom dancing classes so we could increase our intimacy.
Yet, he says to me that he needs his wife and that I’m too busy with stuff?
This was Jachym and I a few years ago. A snapshot of our marriage when I didn’t know what his needs were or how I could meet them.
I still remember that conversation. It was disheartening to hear from my husband that he didn’t care about all that I was doing. I felt like all my efforts were in vain. There I was, investing all this time and work into our household, planning and organizing things, yet he still wasn’t happy.
At that moment, I started to doubt myself and my ability to be a good wife. Did I not try hard enough? Did I really need to do more?
The answer was no. Our love languages were different. Jachym didn’t realize that my acts of service were actually for him. In fact, all the time that I spent doing household chores and organizing our lives felt like time away from him. What he actually needed was quality time with me. More quiet, alone time with me where we could be intimate and just us.
Once we found our new understanding, our relationship recovered and became so much more vibrant. We ended up appreciating each other more. What was once a mismatch became an understanding of our different needs and how we can serve one another.
Want to get to that happy place with your partner too? Read on, because these tips can literally change your marriage overnight.
What are the Basic Needs of a Husband?
If your husband is a human being, his basic needs are:
- Physiological (food, water, warmth, rest)
- Safety needs
These are the basic needs of any human being.
But you probably didn’t come here for these needs. You want to see him being happy and satisfied with you. That’s great! But just know that the needs we are looking at aren’t as fundamental as food and water.
You literally can’t survive without these. But your husband can survive without you. That said, his needs are vital for his emotional well-being and fulfilling them can do wonders for your marriage.
In our premium coaching program The Cherished Wife, we help you identify exactly what your husband needs and how to fulfill those needs naturally without compromising yourself! Just imagine how good life is when your husband:
- Wants to spend time with you
- Is passionately in love with you
- Adores you and wants to fulfill your deepest desires
If you want that, head over here to secure your spot now!
The Top 5 Needs of a Husband
According to the popular book “His Needs, Her Needs” by Willard F. Jr. Harley, the needs of a husband are:
- Sexual fulfillment
- Recreational companionship
- An attractive spouse
- Domestic support
While the needs of a wife are:
- Honesty and openness
- Financial commitment
- Family commitment
Do we agree with this list that’s cited all over the internet? Partially.
A Cherished Wife knows how to bring out the best in her man.– Natasha & Jachym Jerie
Here’s what we know for sure:
Your husband needs to feel loved, respected and valued. The problem with the list from Mr. Harley is that it oversimplifies things. Your husband might not find sex as important because his love language is acts of service.
So what are the top five needs of a husband?
Respect is vital for a man and a husband. This is something women often don’t get. They don’t see how they’re being disrespectful to him when they try to change him for the better. They don’t realize that they are undermining his authority when they nag at him.
Respect is important because it shows him that you trust his lead. You trust him as a man. Feeling respected is one of the most important needs of a husband.
2. A happy wife
Your husband needs to see you happy. He’s with you because you enrich his life. Without a happy wife, a husband will feel inadequate. He’ll question whether he’s doing something wrong. That’s why it’s necessary for a husband to see his wife happy.
Seeing you happy lets your man know that he’s a good husband to you. That’s why in our premium coaching program The Cherished Wife, we focus on you first. You need to become a happy wife so that you can share your happiness with your husband.
It’s in your happiness that lies the magic to naturally attract him to spend more time with you and inspire him to do what you truly desire. It doesn’t have to be all hard work. If anything, you probably have been trying too hard. If you are ready to start experiencing an effortless relationship magic in your life, head over here to apply now.
It’s through your happiness that your relationship can transform into the beautiful union it really is.
If a relationship is about you, it’s miserable. If it’s about serving your partner, it becomes blissful.– Jachym Jerie
Your husband needs to be with you. But this means that you have to drop the idea of the WIIFM (what’s in it for me) radio station. Instead, you need to embrace that this marriage is about the two of you. His needs are your needs and your needs are his needs.
Together, you can become an unstoppable team. But as long as you think you’ll lose out if you give him all the love, respect, support, validation that he wants, you’ll be struggling. Your husband wants to know that you serve him with your heart.
This is in no way meant to be sexist. Just like you serve your husband, your husband will serve you. But it has to start somewhere; that’s why we’re starting with you. When you meet your husband’s need for ‘togetherness,’ many other pieces fall into place.
Because you’ve made a fundamental shift of how you approach your relationship. Your husband’s needs don’t become a chore; meeting them becomes an expression of love.
Your husband needs your support for his dreams and ambitions. He has to prove himself to enough people already. You can be there and believe in him. This alone can draw out the best in him because he doesn’t want to let you down.
Believe it or not, your husband loves to be your hero. He wants you to be proud of him. Your support can do wonders for him. That’s why supporting him will meet one of the top five needs.
5. Deep connection
Your man wants to feel you. He wants you to fully open yourself without any reservation. There’s nothing as desirable as a woman who can fully let herself go in her man’s presence. When you surrender to love, you give yourself to your husband.
This surrender can be felt energetically. It inspires deep connection that goes beyond sex or having a soulful conversation. It’s like you show yourself completely naked without any protection and you let your man see you just as you are. It’s this kind of surrender that truly meets your husband’s need for connection.
In our The Cherished Wife Program, we help you strip away any walls you’ve created due to past hurt. Once these drop, you naturally connect to your feminine goddess within you and let the light shine from this tender yet powerful place onto your relationship.
Now that you got the top five needs of your husband, how do you understand them?
How to Understand Your Husband’s Needs
“Why’s it so important to him that I meet his friends?”
“Why does he want sex so often?”
“Why does he expect me to cook for him?”
These are all natural questions to have. After all, you’re not your husband. Your husband either complains or asks things of you that are important to him. You might not understand it yet, but he isn’t asking just for fun; he’s asking because these things mean something to him. They often are clues for a need that’s not being met by you.
We don’t need to understand in order to respect our spouse’s needs.– Natasha Koo
Not Getting Your Needs Met
I don’t get why Natasha loves it when I do things around the house. But I for sure know that it’s vital for her. That is enough for me to make sure I do it. I know that she’ll feel more loved and appreciated this way.
The easiest way to understand your husband’s needs is to imagine your own needs. Maybe you find affection really important. Now, what would happen if your husband suddenly stopped being affectionate? How would you feel about that?
Guess what? That’s how he feels when you don’t meet his needs.
If you’re anything like me, your alarm bells will go off and you start asking yourself whether something is wrong. You then start feeling like you don’t matter to your husband. If you’re in a place like this, we got you covered!
In our The Cherished Wife Program we help you rekindle the love, passion, and connection you once had. You can have your happily-ever-after; you simply got to know how you can create it. So many women fail to do that because they lack the blueprint for a happy marriage.
Your Husband Has Different Needs Than You
We often think that how we perceive things is how everyone sees it. We don’t get that our perspective is unique to us.
Your husband’s desire for you to cook for him is a desire to be loved. For some reason, he links being cooked for to being loved. You have your own unique ways to feel loved and sometimes these things don’t match up.
Your husband’s needs don’t have to make sense to you, simply know that they are important to him and that you’re doing something wonderful for him when you meet them.
Yes, we got the top 5 needs, but is that enough?
It’ll take you a long way if you implement these. But let’s look a bit more closely at what your husband really needs from you.
The masculine and feminine dance together. They are not opposing forces.– Natasha & Jachym Jerie
Be His Lover, Not His Mother
Many relationships deteriorate because the underlying dynamic isn’t right. Instead of feeling attracted to your husband, you feel like his mom.
- Picking up after him
- Nagging him
- Trying to do it all
- Feeling like you are totally on your own.
That’s not a good place to be in. If this is the case, you might have slipped into the mother role, rather than being his lover. Your husband doesn’t need you to be his mom, he needs you to be his partner!
In our flagship coaching program The Cherished Wife, we show you exactly how you can turn things around.
When you join our premium program, you:
- Become irresistible to your man.
- Be his dream woman that he truly does want to spend the rest of his life with.
- Know how to communicate so he gets you and you get what you need.
- Heal your wounds and step into your feminine power.
You don’t have to live in a passionless and loveless marriage. We know how you can change things for good. Hop over here to secure your spot now. Gone are the days where you’re wondering what your husband needs from you.
But let’s get started now to make sure that you can start meeting your man’s needs today.
Physical Needs of a Man
Does a man need sex?
Yes and no. A man is biologically wired to have sex. If you don’t release yourself every once in a while, mother nature will do it for you. But it goes way beyond simple biology.
Sex can go beyond the physical and become spiritual. That’s when it really becomes nourishing.– Jachym Jerie
Sex is a profound way to express love and intimacy. It’s a physical way of communicating with each other. So it’s an important part of most relationships. It is in the bedroom that many women feel like they can truly surrender to the moment.
This kind of surrender leads to the masculine and feminine energies properly playing out. You see, we might want equality in terms of what we can do, but we don’t want equality that leads to dullness.
When everything is equal, it becomes bland. Your man wants to experience his masculine strength. You, as his partner, have the power to draw this out from him.
By giving yourself fully to him. By letting go of control and diving into the moment. It’s your feminine energy that can draw out your man’s masculine energy. Do you see how sex can be transformational in your relationship if you deeply explore it?
There’s so much more to your man’s physical needs than simply having sex. It can become a deeply spiritual experience that enriches both of you. It can meet the needs that both of you have at a very deep level.
Emotional Needs of a Husband
Your man has emotional needs too.
He might not be the touchy-feely type, yet he’s still driven by his emotions. So what are his emotional needs?
We have touched on them briefly above:
Respect, value, and love
But there are a few more and we encourage you to meet these needs for your husband.
We can’t serve love and protect our fears at the same time. Which one are you going to choose?– Natasha Koo
Your Husband Needs Emotional Safety
Your man wants to feel emotionally safe with you. What does this mean? It means that any form of:
Has to go from your communication style. If you engage in any of these, your husband won’t feel that it’s safe for him to open up. After all, if there’s a chance that he’s going to be met with ridicule, he’d rather keep to himself.
Your Husband Needs Acceptance
So many people feel inadequate. Your husband might be thinking he is:
- Not a good enough husband
- Not a good enough friend
- Not a good enough father
The list goes on and on. You can give to your husband something that’s truly special: acceptance. To love and honor him just as he is, with all his flaws and imperfections. This kind of gift is incredibly powerful.
In The Cherished Wife Program, we show you how you can find this acceptance for your husband and yourself. It’s one of the foundational pieces we teach our women because it has such a profound impact on their relationships and lives. You need to have a strong foundation in order to be able to transform your marriage for good. Meeting your husband’s needs is what will give your marriage an incredible boost.
Your Husband Needs Forgiveness
With acceptance also comes forgiveness. But we don’t mean the kind of forgiveness where you become a doormat. We mean forgiveness as a letting go of the emotional baggage you carry around.
Letting go of that puts you in power to take the lessons from all your experiences without having to be hurting. When you forgive your husband, you set yourself and your husband free. He knows that it’s ok to make mistakes.
That doesn’t mean you just go along with everything. No, you still have your boundaries and you still can communicate when something isn’t right. But you are showing your husband that you appreciate him as he is and that you see the greatness in him even when he falls short.
How to Meet Your Husband’s Emotional Needs
Here’s a short and sweet formula:
- Know his needs
- Know how to satisfy this need
- Brainstorm ideas how you can meet them
- Do it!
If your husband likes to be praised, then look for all the things he is doing great and tell him. Do this on a daily basis and you’ll see him transform.
If your husband loves sex, find how you can connect to your own sexuality in a more powerful way. After all, your husband wants you to enjoy this with him.
Do you see how this works?
It all starts with your willingness to meet your husband’s emotional needs. When his love tank is full, he has the capacity to reciprocate and give you what you need.
But it takes more than just doing it like a chore, it’s an act of selfless giving. It’s not coming from a place of ‘how do I deal with my husband’s needs.’ That kind of attitude feels like you just want to get it over with and get on with your life.
His unmet needs are an opportunity for you to discover something more about you, your husband, and your relationship.
A Cherished Wife feels the strength of her man and lets herself go in his presence.– Natasha & Jachym Jerie
We all come into a marriage wanting to be happy together for the rest of our lives. But the truth is that many of us go into this union blind.
We may not know how to communicate in a relationship. We might even be clueless about what our partners need and how to fulfill them.
But that in itself isn’t the problem. Just because you’re figuring things out in your marriage doesn’t mean that it’s doomed. As long as you’re willing to learn and actually apply what works, any issue can be resolved.
From our experience, we see many couples struggle for years using the wrong approach. They enter a negative spiral where there’s more hurt and distance. In an effort to fix that, they try even harder while applying the wrong strategies.
Don’t let that be you. We have a tried and tested 3-step system that can be the turning point of your marriage. Stop the guesswork, because it won’t get you any closer to a happy relationship.
If you want to see for yourself how beautiful, rewarding and fulfilling a marriage you can have, then join the waiting list for our flagship Cherished Wife Program.
You can be a Cherished Wife.
You can be the woman of your man’s dreams.
You can make your dream marriage a reality today.
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