Do you want to be cherished and loved deeply?
Do you want to feel like you’re the most important person to your spouse? That one special woman on this planet that he’s chosen to be with?
You’re probably screaming ‘yes!’ to all these questions.
Yet what if your husband doesn’t make you feel this way? What if you feel like your spouse doesn’t value you anymore?
There’s hope. You’ve found this article and you’re about to find out how to make your husband know your worth. There’s a way to change your current dynamic. You can feel valued and appreciated in the way that you deserve to be. Let’s dive in to make that a reality for your marriage.
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10 Signs Your Husband Doesn’t Value You
It’s heartbreaking when you realize that the person you love so dearly doesn’t value you anymore. But does he really? Let’s look at the 10 signs to determine whether he truly stopped valuing you or not.
Valuing someone isn’t the same as love.- Jachym Jerie
1. He Never Has Time For You
When you first met, he’d clear the calendar just for you. He’d text you, call you, and make a long trip just to see you. Now, he barely gets home for dinner, then watches TV before falling asleep. Him not making time for you is a sign that your husband doesn’t value you anymore.
What we truly value can be seen by observing where we put our time and attention to. Your husband not making time for you shows a lack of value for you. If you want more attention from him, head over here.
2. He Doesn’t Listen to You
Just like he’d make time for you, he’d also listen to you when you first met. Now, he doesn’t. He barely pays attention to what you say or doesn’t even ask you questions about your day, your dreams, and fears. Not listening to you can be a sign that he doesn’t value you anymore.
But we also have to say that he might simply not be someone who values verbal communication so much. If that’s the case, you could be mistaking his ‘not listening’ for a lack of valuing you. In reality, he simply doesn’t care about words so much.
3. He Doesn’t Acknowledge Your Feelings
We don’t want to see the people we value in pain. When your husband stops valuing you, he often will stop caring about how you feel. However, if he’s quite numb to his own feelings, his lack of empathy could mean that he simply doesn’t know how to deal with hurt besides suppressing it.
The best gauge for whether he stopped valuing you is to look back on how he used to behave. If he used to be compassionate and suddenly isn’t, it could be a sign that he stopped valuing you. But if he often hasn’t given you emotional support, this here will help.
4. He Treats Others Better Than You
When you hold someone in high regard, you treat them well. If you see your husband treating others better than you, it’s a warning sign and can definitely indicate that he’s stopped valuing you.
5. He Gets Easily Frustrated With You
Rather than patiently listening to you and hearing you out, he just dismisses you and you can tell how he’s frustrated with you. While you can’t say that this sign by itself says that he doesn’t value you anymore, it can support the other signs.
Your husband could also simply be under a lot of pressure at work and doesn’t have the capacity to truly be with you. It’s not that he doesn’t value you in this case, it’s that circumstances are very demanding at the moment and he doesn’t know how to handle it.
6. He Doesn’t Put Any Effort Into The Relationship
What you value, you tend and care for. Not putting any effort into the relationship means that he stopped valuing it as he used to. This means he might not be getting what he used to get from the relationship and is now looking elsewhere to fulfill his needs.
Putting effort into the relationship means to compliment you, look after you, take you out on dates or holidays. It means that he puts an effort into appreciating you and building a stronger connection with you.
7. He Doesn’t Value Your Input
If your man often brushes off your ideas, it could be a sign that he doesn’t value you. But be aware that in certain areas, he just doesn’t want to listen to you. Not because he doesn’t value you, but because he doesn’t believe that you’re qualified to contribute something meaningful to it.
I don’t give Natasha input on what make-up to buy. I don’t know. I’m completely clueless. Pay attention if he dismisses you all the time or just in certain situations.
8. He Doesn’t Give You Any Affection Anymore
As with the other signs, this one could have other causes as well. But a lack of affection does often point to things not being quite right. He could still value you but not love you in the same way anymore. Value and love are two different things. In some cases, they go out the window together. But in other cases, they don’t.
9. He Talks Badly About You in Public
You are a couple and a unit. If he starts talking badly about you in front of other people, it’s a sign of disrespect. Just listen to someone who is deeply in love with their spouse. They won’t talk badly about their spouse.
Because they love and value them deeply. Sometimes people want input from others and they bring things up in public that you wouldn’t. In this case, he isn’t showing you that he doesn’t value you anymore, he’s simply looking for help.
You need to discuss what you’re willing and comfortable to share in public as well as how he can get the help he’s looking for.
10. He Doesn’t Help You
Being valued and appreciated is often expressed by him going out of his way to help you. When he stops doing that, a routine might have settled into your relationship and he starts taking you for granted.
Valuing you and the relationship is often expressed by wanting to make the other person’s life better. He might not realize that he stopped caring and valuing you as he used to. That’s why you do want to do something about it.
Now that we’ve covered the 10 signs your husband doesn’t value you anymore, let’s take a closer look at why this happens.
Why Does My Husband Not Value Me
Freshly brewed coffee.
You can smell it seeping through the doors. You can hear your husband being busy in the kitchen. Before you can wonder what he’s up to, he serves you breakfast in bed. Wow! You feel cozy and nice inside and out.
If you have memories like this and you wish your husband would do things like this for you again, don’t worry, we got you covered. In our The Cherished Wife Program we show you exactly how you can regain the love, connection and intimacy you once had.
Gone are the days when you have to beg for attention. Instead, your husband will want to read your mind to fulfill your desires. If you want to transform your relationship, head over here to apply for your spot now.
We only can work with a limited amount of women who are truly committed to their love life. If that’s you, don’t wait.
He Doesn’t Understand What You Need to Feel Valued
How do you know you’re being valued?
We’re asking this question so that you know what you need in order to feel valued. What being valued means to you might not mean the same to your husband. Your husband could think that he’s showing you that he values you by working hard to earn money for you. Meanwhile, you feel unvalued because he isn’t home enough.
Do you see how easily you can have a miscommunication about this? The clearer you are on what shows you that he values you, the easier you can communicate your needs. When your needs are met you won’t be asking yourself anymore, ‘how to make your husband know your worth?’; you’ll just know.
We can’t feel truly accepted by others if we don’t accept ourselves.- Natasha Koo
He Feels Hurt By You
Whenever we feel hurt, we tend to withdraw from the other person. We do this to ‘protect’ ourselves from further hurt. If your husband has been hurt by you, he could be withdrawing because of it. In turn, you will feel like he doesn’t care about you but in reality he simply hasn’t healed his own wound yet.
He Doesn’t Feel Valued By You
When a man feels disrespected, he also feels not valued. Many women try to control their men. It’s a recipe for disaster.
Because he won’t feel like you value him. What will ensue is a power struggle between you two. Whenever there are people wanting power, valuing the other goes out the window. They can’t coexist in a romantic relationship. Instead, you both will be struggling to reassert your worth towards each other.
His Priorities in Life Have Shifted
It’s normal that what we value changes as we go through life. If your man valued adventure with you and suddenly changed to wanting to just stay at home, that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t value you anymore. It means his priorities and needs have changed.
That’s one of the challenges in a relationship: We keep evolving as individuals. That includes you and your partner. You need to stay up to date with your partner rather than thinking you know him and that he’ll always stay the same person.
His priorities could also shift to such a degree that relationships don’t matter to him as much as they used to.
This is a small sample of reasons why your husband doesn’t value you anymore. We don’t know for sure what has happened, or if it’s even true that he doesn’t value you anymore. But we do know that your experience is real for you and that you don’t feel valued.
Luckily it doesn’t have to stay this way.
What to Do When Your Husband Doesn’t Value You
You want to change your husband.
But the truth is that you’re afraid of your own feelings. When your husband doesn’t value you, you feel a certain way and it sucks. You want to change things because you believe that your feelings are caused by the situation.
We don’t react to circumstances, we react to our own meaning making.– Natasha & Jachym Jerie
What if the solution isn’t in changing things but rather in facing what you want to run away from?
In our flagship coaching program The Cherished Wife we don’t just help you change your man for the better. We go far beyond that and guide you to be the woman he can’t resist. That can only happen when you become at peace with yourself.
You get to experience and deepen the passion, love and connection you once had. That’s why the program doesn’t just teach you the right relationship mindset so you finally understand your husband. No, it shows you also the negative patterns that have infiltrated your relationship and how you can get rid of them. Head over here to apply for your spot today.
The Trick of the Mind
“My husband doesn’t value me…”
This isn’t an issue. It’s an issue because you believe that you’re not valuable. No one’s judgment has power over you. It only ever gains power when you believe it yourself. This is why your husband’s lack of value for you is a fantastic opportunity for your own growth.
In order to move through the pain, we encourage you to question your mind’s story. What’s your mind telling you about not being valued? What does it mean about you when your husband doesn’t value you?
You’ll very quickly get to the core of believing that you’re not good enough. This belief needs to be challenged gently so that you can see the truth that lies behind it.
Do you see how deep we’re taking this? That’s exactly what we do in The Cherished Wife Program. We want to make sure that you don’t just get a fantastic relationship. We want to ensure that you feel happy inside no matter what.
Now that we’ve covered what you can do when your husband doesn’t value you, let’s look at how you can change your circumstances as well. After all, we do want to help you to have an amazing and dream-come-true relationship! And in a dream-come-true relationship, you know that your husband knows your worth.
How to Make Your Husband Value You Again
You know it.
He doesn’t have to say a word, but you know it:
He deeply loves, appreciates and values you. That’s what you can have in your relationship. Feeling valued doesn’t have as much to do with the words you hear; it has everything to do with how your husband interacts with you. How he looks at you, touches you, and is present with you.
How do you get there?
An Exceptional Relationship takes an exceptional commitment. Are you ready for that?- Natasha & Jachym Jerie
Fill Your Own Cup
Happiness is contagious and it’s very attractive.
If you’re like most women, you are stressed and unhappy. Which is why you have to start with yourself first. The more you can take care of yourself by treating yourself well, the more appealing you become to your husband. Your husband will know your worth when you know it yourself.
It’s that simple.
This means that you stop doing everything in the house. It means that you go out and have fun. You start prioritizing yourself first. But isn’t it selfish?
Yes and no.
You are putting yourself first so that you can engage with your husband differently. When your cup is full, you’ll be able to fill your husband’s cup. If your cup is empty ….
With feminism raging, you might think that men are useless, bad, and dangerous beings. Well, they aren’t. And the quicker you embrace your husband as a powerful, capable, and strong man, the better your relationship will become.
Women nowadays are so busy showing men that they are independent that they forget how much better life is when you stop being independent and become interdependent. This is often very scary because it means that you admit that you need him (btw, he needs you too).
Respecting your man is a first step to showing him that you embrace him and that you acknowledge his value. In turn, your husband will know your worth as well.
Being a Cherished Wife requires you to let go of trying to control your husband.- Natasha Koo
Many relationships are starving.
They’ve become disconnected from love. But love is what invigorates a relationship. When you cut off the love, you’re soon left with a wilted flower. You can turn it around by starting to appreciate your man.
Most likely there are a bunch of negative behaviors in your relationship like:
You want to get rid of these and replace them with appreciation. The list above is what happens when the relationship turns away from love. Appreciation is what connects it back to love.
The less you let fear into your relationship the stronger it becomes.
In The Cherished Wife Program we give you audios to help you rewire your brain to start seeing the amazing man you once fell in love with again. The more you see that in him, the more you’ll bring it out in him. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Before you know it, he’ll sweep you up in his strong arms and cancel everything for today just to be with you! The change starts with you. What are you going to choose? Love or fear? Head over here now to show your commitment to the relationship.
How to Raise Your Value in a Relationship
Are you a commodity?
Then why are you reducing yourself to one?
You might think that you’re not. I disagree. Asking yourself how to raise your value reduces you to a commodity. If you’re not valuable, you’re going to be discarded. But love doesn’t think in terms of valuable or not valuable.
Love just loves.
Love isn’t transactional and it surely is not economical.- Natasha & Jachym Jerie
Although, many couples do treat their relationship like an economy where they barter for each other’s attention, favors, and power.
Because this relationship has no foundation in love. It reduces human interaction to trading. You become a piece of meat or a walking ATM. We can do better than that. Way better. If you’re looking to raise your value in a relationship do this:
Stop thinking about value.
From ‘Raising Value’ to Service
Love wants to give and receive.
Instead of thinking how to raise your value, ask yourself this: how can I be of service to my husband? This question is about giving up a selfish pursuit and simply giving yourself to the relationship and your partner.
Being of service to your partner is one of the best things you can do. It:
- Ends power struggle
- Ends overthinking whether you’re good enough for him
- Enhances you as a couple
- Connects you back to love
Relationships don’t have to be complicated; we make them that because we mistake our thoughts for reality.- Natasha & Jachym Jerie
Stop Serving Fear and Become a Servant to Love
Your husband wants to be loved.
So do you.
But you can’t let love flow freely through your relationship if you’re totally self-obsessed and filled with insecurities. The basis of these insecurities is fear. Let go of the fear and you come back to love.
The whole value game is built on insecurities:
“Am I valuable enough?”
“Am I worthy?”
“Am I good enough for him?”
What if you implicitly knew that you’re good enough? Suddenly the whole ‘raise your value’ idea collapses. And guess what: there’s nothing more attractive than a woman who totally is in acceptance of herself.
That’s what we teach in The Cherished Wife Program. We don’t want you to feel superficial change in your life; we want you to rediscover your inner goddess. We want you to reconnect to the powerful and beautiful energy that pulses through you.
This energy doesn’t ask whether it’s good enough or not. It just knows. That’s how you get to transform your relationship for the better! This program isn’t for the women who want to hold onto their victim-identity. It’s for women who are ready to go all out in their lovelife and are tired of small fixes that break apart.
If that’s you, then head over here and apply to secure your spot now.
One thing is for sure: it’s never nice to feel unworthy and not valued by your partner. But now you have an overview of the ten signs your husband doesn’t value you and the reasons why he doesn’t. You’re not helpless in this situation. The three keys we shared on how to make your husband value you again might just be what your marriage needs.
Stop repeating the same things that never worked for you. You can learn from your past and where your relationship is at this moment. But you have to first recognize the nuances happening in your marriage that are making you feel more and more disempowered as a wife.
One way to turn things around is to implement our tips on what to do when your husband doesn’t value you.
Take action today.
That’s right. There’s nothing more important than your engagement to raise your value in a relationship. Stop waiting for change to happen on its own. Because it rarely does.
If you feel tired of trying to figure it all out on your own, then reserve your spot in our flagship The Cherished Wife Program. We’ll hold your hand and guide you to the Exceptional Relationship you’ve always wanted but didn’t know how to get. In this premium program, you’ll get the behind-the-scenes secret to our own successful marriage. This dream can be yours too. You could be free of all your marital troubles and headaches. The choice is yours.
Loved what we shared so far, but have more specific questions on this topic? Check out our answers to your frequently-asked questions when it comes to uplevelling your worth and value in your marriage. Maybe it answers the very question that you’ve been stuck on.
FAQ – What Should I Do?
The following answers are more general and might not apply to you. Use them as inspiration rather than truth.
How to Make Him Value You After a Fight
It happens to all of us.
We get angry at each other. We fight and then regret what we’ve said. Your husband might treat you badly because he’s hurt and you wonder how you can make him value you again. Here’s how:
Yes. That’s all that it takes. But it can be scary. It means to dive deep into yourself and feel your hurt. It also means that you need to be with your husband and face the hurt together. When you heal as a couple, it can truly make you closer and stronger than before.
We want to be valued by others but we often don’t value ourselves.- Jachym Jerie
How to Make Him See You as High-Value
As we’ve discussed above: you’re not a commodity. But we are aware of what people usually refer to as ‘high’ or ‘low value.’ To make it simple for you: the less insecure you are, the higher your perceived value will be.
Because insecurities are based in fears. They make us:
- Look for constant reassurance
When you’re secure in yourself you’ll ooze a natural confidence. That’s exactly what happens when you join our The Cherished Wife Program. We’ve designed the program so that you naturally see through your insecurities and discover the natural confidence that’s always there.
We’re not trying to make you into someone you’re not or make you ‘fake it until you make it.’ No, we help you to be authentically yourself and your husband will love you for it.
My Husband Doesn’t Value My Opinion
Do you try to get validation by your husband thinking what you say is useful?
If you do, try this instead:
He knows what to do, he’s your strong man. How about you trust him?
When you show that you trust him and you value his opinion, you’ll find a way to bring up your opinion in a non-threatening way. You don’t have to be quiet and just let him do his thing. No, you can direct his energy into a good direction, but you won’t do that by trying to get validation through your opinions.
Your opinion really has nothing to do with you. Opinion and the person who holds that opinion are two different things. If you mix them up, you’ll feel worthless when people disagree with you.
Husband Doesn’t Value My Time
Do you value your time?
I do. Which is why I cancel any sessions with my clients if they don’t show up after 5 minutes. Since I do that, people show up on time. How do you show that you value your time? Not through talking about it but through action.
If you want people to value your time, you need to value it first, and that starts with a clear commitment and clear boundaries.
My Husband Doesn’t Value My Feelings
Are they valuable?
I’m not sure I would say my feelings are valuable or that Natasha’s feelings are valuable. They’re real. They are important because they shape a lot of our experiences. When you say ‘my husband doesn’t value my feelings’, are you actually saying he isn’t acknowledging them?
Or that he isn’t respecting them? Well, that’s a different story.
If he isn’t respecting your feelings, you probably aren’t clear on your own boundaries. The clearer you are with them, the easier you can communicate them through your body language. You don’t have to keep reiterating your boundaries, you simply live them.
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