How Can I Get My Husband to Pay More Attention to Me?

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Remember the times when you used to be his number one?

He’d change plans to be with you. Say no to his guy friends to make time for you.

Back then, you didn’t have to beg for his attention. He wanted you! And he made you feel special.

But now? It’s like pulling teeth. Enough is enough! You’re ready to be on his mind again. Not only that, you want to be his priority. And you want all that… without feeling needy.

Isn’t this the least that a wife can ask for?


You can indeed get your husband to pay attention to you again. You can ignite your connection so that you’re magnetically drawn towards each other, instead of being repelling forces. Don’t want to nag or nitpick at him to pay more attention to you? Want to know the tricks that can help you get back on track? Want to stop thinking ‘How can I get my husband to pay more attention to me?’This article will cover all that and more so let’s dive right in!

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Why Is My Husband Not Giving Me Attention

Is he cheating?


But there are all kinds of other reasons why husbands ignore their wives. Let’s go over a few here.


1. He’s Stressed


We live in a world that demands a lot of attention from us. Our phones are constantly by our sides and we’re always bombarded with messages. Some people simply get overloaded from all this and can neither pay attention nor give you the affection you want. 

If your husband has a lot at hand at work, he simply might not have the energy to give you the care and attention you deserve. Does this mean you have to put up with it? No. In our The Cherished Wife Program we show you how you naturally can regain your husband’s attention without nagging or manipulation. Click here and apply for your spot today.


2. He Speaks a Different Love Language


I felt totally neglected by Natasha when we hit a busy streak in our life. I just wanted her to be with me and spend some time together. But she was busy taking care of the household. One day I couldn’t take it anymore and I blurted out: “Screw the lunch, why don’t you spend more time with me?!”

Natasha looked at me surprised and said “You could at least help!”

What we realized later is that Natasha was expressing her love for me through taking care of the household. I express my love through quality time and physical touch. Both of us felt neglected because neither of us realized we spoke different love languages


3. He Feels Hurt


Many men have been taught that it’s not ok to feel their emotions. They often believe that it’s a sign of weakness if you were to show your feelings. That’s why they withdraw and try to work things out for themselves. 

We women often feel neglected when this happens. But just because he’s withdrawing doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you anymore. 

A different kind of hurt is when your husband’s needs aren’t being met over a prolonged period of time. This can lead to him withdrawing from the relationship because he feels he’s never going to get his needs met. 


4. He’s Lost Interest

Sometimes a relationship is starved to death because both people don’t pay attention to it. Like a flower, a relationship needs attention and care. This means that you need to make time for each other and do things you really enjoy with each other.

If your man has lost interest, it’s not all hopeless. You can still turn things around. In The Cherished Wife Program we show you how you can turn on your feminine superpower that makes you irresistible to your husband.


5. He Doesn’t Feel Safe With You


Another reason why your husband isn’t giving you attention might be because he doesn’t feel emotionally safe with you. Many women get frustrated with their husbands and they let them know in no uncertain terms. This often leads to the man withdrawing and the woman complaining more.

To ensure this doesn’t happen, make sure that you stay away from:

  • Nagging
  • Bickering
  • Blaming
  • Criticizing
  • Attacking

These are negative communication patterns that aren’t going to bring your relationship forward. Instead, they slowly kill it.

Now that you all know this, what are you supposed to do? Let’s first make a little detour first and explore what your reasons are for needing his attention in the first place.


Why Do I Crave Attention From My Husband

It happens to all of us:

We feel neglected and abandoned.

It’s a normal human experience to have. It often shows up in romantic relationships because we attach to our partners and want them to fulfill certain needs we have. Again, that’s fairly normal. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to spend time with someone you love. It’s normal that you also want to feel validated by the other person.

The issue is that some people need a lot of attention and validation. Why’s that?

You either choose love or you choose fear. You can’t choose both.- Jachym Jerie



People seek a lot of reassurance if they’re insecure about themselves. They try to get rid of this insecurity by having someone else affirm that they are worthy. But it doesn’t really work. As long as you keep being insecure, you’ll need the attention to cover it up. 

If you’re finding yourself craving your husband’s attention all the time, spend some time with yourself to find out what happens when you don’t get this. Doing this will show you what you’re so insecure about.


You Have an Anxious Attachment Style


As we grow up we’re shaped by how our parents interact with us. If a parent is not consistent with how they relate to their kid, the kid wouldn’t know how the parent will react in the future, making them insecure. 

The attachment style we form in childhood can express themselves in our adult relationships. If you’re finding yourself craving attention from your husband, it might be a sign that you have an anxious attachment style. The good news is that our attachment styles aren’t fixed. 

Attachment styles do have a link to your own insecurities. These insecurities simply often show themselves in relationships. What does this mean? You could be totally confident as long as you aren’t dating, but as soon as you start being in a relationship all these insecurities start showing up.

We believe that no matter what kind of insecurities you carry around, you want to address them. Yes, you can ‘manage’ an insecure attachment style. Doing that has it’s value and importance. But if you take your attachment style as an excuse to not look at these insecurities, you’re preventing yourself from growing in important areas of your life. 

You crave your husband’s attention but aren’t getting it. You might reach a point where you’re asking yourself:


How Do I Stop Wanting Attention From My Husband?

A relationship makes a leap forward when you stop trying to take and start to give.- Natasha Koo

I want Natasha to pay attention to me. 

If she doesn’t, why are we together? As a couple, you’re sharing a life together. A relationship isn’t about leading parallel lives next to each other. If you want to stop yourself from wanting attention from your husband so that you can just co-exist instead of thriving together, we won’t help you with it. 


Because it won’t be of service to you. But you absolutely can get rid of constant attention-seeking and replace it with a healthy sense of wanting to spend time together.


1. Be With Yourself


Don’t abandon yourself!

Many people don’t honor the emotional experience they’re going through. If you feel neglected and abandoned, it isn’t useful to judge yourself. You really want attention from your husband right now and that’s ok. It doesn’t mean that you have to get the attention from him though. But it does mean that you truly acknowledge it. 

By being with yourself, you’re allowing yourself to fully see the part of you that feels this strong neglect. It’s your attention that has the power to heal this part.


2. Love and Compassion

Whatever you go through, bring love and compassion into your experience. We’re often very harsh to ourselves. But all this does is keep the pattern in place.
Instead, you need to treat your tender spots with great love and care. The more love and care you bring towards yourself, the less you’ll crave attention from your husband. 

You’ll be centered within yourself, and from this whole place you’ll be able to build an amazing relationship with your husband. 

Now that we’ve looked at what you can do when you don’t get the attention. We’ve shown you the key pieces that’ll allow you to experience more wholeness inside of you. But this doesn’t mean that your husband will now pay attention to you.


What to Do When Your Husband Gives You No Attention?

Endless gazing into your eyes….

A tender touch.

That’s what it used to be like with your husband, right? Where has it gone? And how can you bring it back? That’s exactly why we’ve created The Cherished Wife Program, a surefire way to bring back the love, connection and intimacy you crave so much. 

You don’t have to do this all by yourself. You can have someone next to you who shows you exactly what to do to turn your relationship around. Head over here, to apply for your spot now

But we’re not going to let you be all by yourself right now! No. Let’s look at what you can when your husband gives you no attention.

We’ve covered a really important piece above: Take care of yourself first. This means to heal your own wounds. Your husband ignoring you is your opportunity to heal some deep wounds. Doing that will allow your relationship to flow more freely and naturally. It’ll also make you more equipped to deal with the challenge at hand.

Without further delay, let’s dive in:


3 Powerful Tips: How Can I Get My Husband to Give Me More Attention?


What makes you attractive?

Do you feel an unease creep up when you read that question? Is your mind jumping in and saying “I’m not attractive!”?

If it is, you’ve found your first spot that you need to work on. No, you don’t have to tell yourself that you’re attractive until you turn blue. All you need to do is to see through the illusion of what your mind’s telling you. 

You believing that you’re not attractive is going to spill over into your relationship. You’ll behave a certain way that can push your husband away. It’ll then confirm your belief that you’re not attractive otherwise he would be paying more attention to you! 


1. Have Fun!


Here’s what makes a person attractive: They enjoy themselves.

There’s something magical about someone who loves life. They ooze a charisma out that’s hard to resist. A woman who has fun is a thousand times more attractive than a woman who’s worried about her looks, the bills, the house, the kids etc.

Take yourself less seriously and see how you can find joy in your everyday life. Just doing that is going to make your husband pay more attention to you naturally.


2. Let Go

If you’re the one who takes care of everything, you need to stop. Why? Because you’re most likely controlling. Controlling is the opposite of fun.

“Why haven’t you taken out the trash?!” 
“Why are you so late?” 
“You know I hate it! “
“Can’t you just stop doing this?!”

All of these statements aren’t pleasing. They’re often interlaced with anger and frustration. Don’t try to control everything, especially your husband! When you let go, you actually become ATTRACTive!

To attract means to not pursue, push, or force. You can’t get your husband’s attention through force. You’ll have to become magnetic to him. 

Your husband wants to be your hero. But he can’t be one if you keep managing him.- Natasha & Jachym Jerie

3. Appreciate


Rather than seeing the flaws in your husband, pay attention to the good traits he has. Just like you want attention, he also wants attention. Positive attention! 

You can do a simple challenge, where you write down everyday a few things your husband has done well. Tell him these things. By doing this, you’re allowing what’s good for you to grow in your relationship and you’re letting the negative traits starve by not feeding them. 

When your husband feels how much you love and appreciate him he’s going to want to reciprocate. It’s natural. 


How Do I Tell My Husband I Need More Attention

Sometimes we just want to be upfront. That’s good. 

You can do it as long as you don’t berate the point and it becomes a constant struggle. If you’d like to show your husband that you need more attention, here’s how you can phrase it:

Honey, I know you’re really busy at the moment and I’d like to support you with what you’re doing. But I also noticed that we’re drifting further apart from each other. I don’t feel as loved at the moment as I used to. 

It would really be great if we could spend time together on Tuesday evening after dinner. I’d love to just be with you, without any distractions. Spending this kind of time together would mean so much to me. It’s for me the easiest way to feel loved by you. Would you be open to do that with me?

Why does it work?

  1. She’s acknowledging what he’s going through ( that her man might have something else going on).
  2. She’s stating an observation.
  3. She’s stating how she feels (but she’s not blaming or attacking).
  4. She’s specific about her request.
  5. She explains how important it is for her.
  6. She explains that it would really help her to feel loved more.
  7. She asks if he wants to do it.

Notice that at no point is she forcing anything. He can still say no. That’s good. Your husband wants to make you happy. But he can’t if you either force it on him, or you don’t state your desire specifically.


How to Make Your Husband Interested in You 

Be interesting.

I know it sounds obvious.

But there’s truth to it. Many marriages stagnate because both partners are stuck in a routine. Their life is predictable. Your partner knows what you’re going to say and do when he gets home. You know what his answers will be to your questions because you ask them everyday. 

Sounds boring?

It is. But it isn’t just their relationship that is like this. Often these kinds of couples also have a stagnant life. They have the same friends, hobbies, and work for decades. Not much happening there at all.

When was the last time your heart was beating so fast because you couldn’t contain your excitement? When was the last time you went for an adventure? You want your husband to be interested in you, be passionate about you, but where’s your passion?

You get your husband interested in you when you lead a full life. A life that is right for you. No, you don’t have to go crazy and give up all your belongings to travel the world (you could but you don’t have to).

But we do recommend that you try new things out. Do it alone and together. When you do, you’ll have lots to share about your new experiences. It’ll be really exciting to talk about and guess what? Your excitement will eventually rub off on your husband.

Passion isn’t found in sex, it’s found in the love for life.- Jachym Jerie

No longer will you ask yourself how to get your husband to pay attention to you. 


Because he’s naturally drawn to you. The issue is that when you first dated you weren’t so serious as you are now. You had fun with him. You were playful and flirtatious. Now you aren’t. To get his attention back you have to let go and express your beautiful feminine energy freely.


How to Get Your Husband to Notice You Again


Your husband, like any other heterosexual man, loves the feminine. They’re naturally drawn to it. The feminine and masculine are polar opposites and need each other. But he won’t step into his masculine power until you draw it out of him by being more feminine.

Your man will naturally notice you again because you’re radiating with joy, love, and passion. Gone will be the days where you ask yourself how to get your husband to notice you again. 

The good news is that you don’t have to figure out how to do this by yourself. You can join our The Cherished Wife Program to change your relationship for the better today. Inside, you’ll find the blueprint and actionable steps to transform yourself into the goddess you truly are. 

Many women just don’t fully connect to their femininity and instead slip into mothering their man. But doing that is driving you apart and draining the passion out of the relationship. Instead, you need to lean in and allow yourself to surrender to this very moment. 

It can be scary which is why many women don’t fully allow themselves to explore this side of them. But it’s this feminine quality that can replenish the relationship and bring back what you once had.


How to Keep Your Husband Interested in You

The more we chase what we want, the more elusive it becomes.- Natasha & Jachym Jerie

Once you get your husband’s attention, how do you keep it?

By not wanting to keep it. 

The very act of wanting to keep your husband’s interest, while understandable, is counterproductive. You stop flowing and start grasping and before you know it you’re back to trying to control life and your husband’s attention.

So what do you do instead? You come back to the joy in this moment. You let go of the idea ‘I need attention from my husband’ and instead, flow with the moment. When you’re checking whether your husband is paying attention to you or not, you’re back out of the moment.

Whenever you catch yourself thinking ‘my husband isn’t paying attention to me’, relax. Remember, attention can’t be forced, it’s something that is attracted.

You now have a better understanding of why your husband’s not giving you attention and what you can do to address it. No matter which tip you take away from this article, know that you have the power to shift that dynamic between you and your partner.

The solution is at your fingertips. For example, you can:

  • Gain more clarity on how you’re feeling;
  • Connect to more fun, surrender and appreciation;
  • Open up the communication between you and your husband so that you can face this issue together.
'Is love a chore now?' wonders a wife who wants to get her husband to pay more attention to her. How can I get my husband to pay more attention to me

Your options are endless.

The most powerful thing you can do to receive more of your husband’s attention is to take on one practical action today. Note down the tip or exercise that resonates most with you and commit to it today. So go for it and create the marriage of your dreams!

Value your desires.

Embrace the journey.

Pursue an Exceptional Relationship.

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